Feedback from-Increasing POS Collections in the Admitting Department Assignment #1:
1. Its not clear exactly how you are going to solve the stated problem. Theres a new system coming, but theres no detailed connection as to how this practicum project is going to utilize the system and/or other interventions to solve the collections issue(s).
2. The writing is rather casual and, not strong, in places. For example, the last sentence of the piece is not really a complete sentence. It doesnt sound professional…so the writing needs to be more formalized/tightened up.
3. Importantly, the suggestions made in my Email #13the last one dated September 15.point #2, requests the use of section headings, as well as to avoid prose-type writing. In its current form, your submission is hard to follow as it jumps aroundis not clearly structured to address the 5W questions.and, is written in prose form. You should craft an intro to the situation, describe how your mentor fits into what you are trying to do, etc.
Assignment #2 is what I am asking you to write just gave you the feed back from Assignment 1 to improve 2.
(I will use red to add my remarks/suggestions.)
Title of Proposal this should be clear, brief, and to the point. (You have a coursepak reading that offers insights into formulating a good title.) It should be closely related, if not identical, to what you put in Assignment #1.but, elements can be revised along the way in a constant effort to improve the proposals quality.
Re: total number of pages for the proposal, it should be whatever you feel is needed. But, it should not be too long or too short, e.g., two pages surely aint enough; and, 10-12 is likely too much.
Name of Student/Student Number
Eliminated the 0.0. Abstract will have no section number
Abstract This is normally a short piecea paragraph in length.that overviews what you are proposing to do, how you will be doing it, and, if appropriate, any findings youve made. As with all other elements of this proposal, I would urge you to use the literature for examples. Virtually every published article has an abstract. Read a few to get a sense of what they say/dont say, and how that relates to the paper. Oftentimes, the abstract is the LAST piece written, i.e., after the paper/proposal is done. Or, you can draft one, and, then, revise it later on. It should provide the reader guidance on what exactly he/she can expect to find in the paper.
1.0 General Introduction:
This section should provide a brief description/overview of the situation, interest area or
project under consideration. What is the problem/issue/decision of interest? To whom is
it of interest, and why?
This where you use the 5 Ws to make your case to the reader that this thing is worth reading. Its like a hook in advertising to gain the viewers attention. Again, look at almost any paper in the literature. They all have Introductions, and they are likely all numbered 1.0.
2.0 General Purpose of the Project:
This section should state clearly the general purpose of the practicum project, i.e., what the student plans to accomplish/achieve.
You might have mentioned this in the Introduction, but, you should expand on it here. What are you really trying to achieve. Whats new/unique about it? Why bother? How is it going to add value to the Universe?
3.0 Specific Project Goals:
This section should identify the specific goals that the student will focus on in order to
accomplish the general purpose of the project.
Heres the chance to be really specific about what your trying to make happenor, hope to make happen. Goals should be understandable, important, realistic, and entirely relevant to what youve already written above. Throughout the proposal and, later the paper.there must be a logical flow to what you write. Otherwise, the reader can become confused, and will leave/loose interest.
If you wish to expand on each, note that the section number can be so expanded. For example, expand 3.0 to include, say, 3.1, 3.2, etc. for each goal.
4.0 Value of the Project:
In this section, the student should discuss how the project under consideration will add
value to the student and to the organization. Value-added is critical to arguing for the
importance of the project in the first place.
Expand on what you noted above. Whats new? Whats different? Who will value from it.locally, regionally, nationally, globally, etc.? This is your DELTA. Its the major selling point of any paper looking to be published and/or seen as important to the supporting people/agency. How does it make a difference?
You can do the same in this section as in 3.0. Use expansions such as 4.1., 4.2, etc.
Use the examples provided in your coursepak, as well as use the literature for structures utilized.
5.0 Plan of Action (the stages of the project):
This section should contain a timeline that reflects the major categories of activity the
student expects to manage during the project; e.g., research, preparation of proposal,
meetings with preceptor/mentor, other meetings, preparation of final report, etc. A predicted number of hours to be spent in each category of work should be shown. Recall that a minimum of 135 hours of work/input is needed to fulfill the courses time requirement. No maximum number of hours is specified.
University accreditation requires strict accounting of at least 135 hours of work/input to this project. Construct a detailed figure/table, etc. that shows how this objective metric will be met.
Same can be done here with section numbering5.1, 5.2..or, even, 5.1, 5.1.1, 5.1.2, etc. Sub-sectioning helps organize your thoughts, and makes the readers job easier.
6.0 Documentation:
This section should describe how you will document the processes associated with the
project (e.g., journal entries, copies of meeting minutes, anecdotal comments, etc.). You will not be required to turn in this information. However, the references may be very
useful when preparing the Final Practicum Report, e.g., they can be used in the papers References section.
You will be doing a lot of activities, and collecting a lot of information/data. How will this be done? How/where will it be saved for later use? Offer real detail on this.so, we can be certain that there is a plan in place before the project begins. Again, using sub-sectioning can be useful if you wish to briefly discuss each form of documentation.
7.0 References
This will be a critical part of the paper. EVERYTHING you say/claim that is not yours must be supported/cited. There is an entire book in your coursepak on this topic. One requirement in terms of what you CANNOT USE..Wikipedia. Why? Its not a reliable source. Its a blog. It is never accepted in the traditional, scholarly health care literature.
